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  Metro 5.45pm Update: We asked our IT Dept if we could use the Microsoft outage as a way to cancel a heap of trains this evening. Apparently the running of trains doesn't rely on email servers? The fuck? #MetroTrains

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  Good morning Melbourne! In line with new requirements from today we are not adding a payment surcharge to Myki top-ups performed via credit card. We weren't previously, but we're also not doing so from today. We hope this post has been useful. #MetroTrains

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  Throwback Thursday! This c1980s Graeme Rayson pic shows a Hitachi at the former Galvin Station on the Werribee line. There have been calls for this closed station to reopen due to population growth in the area. We considered the idea and said "nah, fuck that". #MetroTrains #ThrowbackThursday

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  Good morning Melbourne (and Sydney)! A shoutout to our friends up north who today are retiring the K sets with a final public farewell run. The last service will operate Central to Hornsby before terminating at Olympic Park. https://www.transport.nsw.gov.au/news-and-events/media-releases/k-set-to-make-final-timetabled-passenger-run-before-retirement #MetroTrains

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  Daylight Saving Time starts tomorrow. A reminder to turn your Myki forward at 2am. Or back at 2am. Better yet, shove your Myki up your arse at 2am. #MetroTrains

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  Due to the increasing cost of diesel all Myki fares will incur a $1 fuel surcharge from tomorrow. Yes, our trains are fully electric, however we still feel justified in adding the diesel surcharge. Thank you for your co-operation in this matter. #MetroTrains

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  Throwback Thursday! This Peter J Vincent pic shows Frankston Station as it appeared in the late 1970s. We're not sure if the gates in the foreground were part of the level crossing or there to help keep the local bogans out. Probably the latter. #MetroTrains #ThrowbackThursday

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  Heading to PAX this weekend? Taking a train to Southern Cross is a cheap & efficient alternative to driving, and only a short walk from the venue. Bonus: there’s a Woolworths on the concourse for quick and easy purchase of deodorant. #MetroTrains

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  Good morning Melbourne! The Cranbourne and Pakenham lines are suspended between Oakleigh and Dandenong due to vandalism. We’ve provided a limited bus replacement service. You’ll need to get a spot on board Hunger Games style. Good luck! #MetroTrains

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  Throwback Thursday! (a day late) This June 1977 Peter J Vincent pic shows a parcel van crossing Greville St in Prahran. Things have changed significantly since. For example, the person on the left is now much older or perhaps even dead. #MetroTrains #ThrowbackThursday

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  Metro 5.40pm Update: Minor delays on the Hurstbridge, Mernda and Pakenham lines this evening due to it being Friday and we thought t would be a fun way to finish off the week. #MetroTrains

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  Suspension - Sunbury Line Buses are replacing trains between Sunshine and Watergardens due to vandalism, or as we prefer to call it, an unapproved infrastructure alteration initiative. #MetroTrains

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  Found on Reddit. Someone’s getting a talking to from their boss. #MetroTrains

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  Metro 5.35pm Update: Major delays and cancellations across multiple lines this afternoon. We hope this causes a great deal of inconvenience to all those impacted. #MetroTrains

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  Throwback Thursday! These 1990 Dave Richards pics show a freight derailment at Melbourne Yard which destroyed a shunter's cabin. This was quite convenient as the employee wellness program at the time aimed to ensure staff spent less time inside. #MetroTrains #ThrowbackThursday

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  Metro 5.40pm Update: Minor delays on several lines this afternoon, otherwise all lines running a good service. However, we've got some major delays and lengthy suspensions/bus replacements planned for next week. Have a good weekend, cunts! #MetroTrains

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  Metro 5.40pm Update: Minor delays on the Alamein, Belgrave and Lilydale lines this evening because - despite us having done this for years - we’re just not very good at running a train network. #MetroTrains

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  Throwback Thursday! This May 1973 PROV pic shows City Loop construction, a project started by the Bolte government. This is when the Liberals actually supported building transport infrastructure, unlike the dopey cow currently leading the party. #MetroTrains #ThrowbackThursday

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  Due to the Melbourne Cup tomorrow, a reminder our train services will be delayed, cancelled and otherwise shitfucked according to a public holiday timetable. #MetroTrains

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  Throwback Thursday! This c1930 VR pic shows sheep being loaded on to rail wagons at Newmarket Saleyards. The yards closed years ago - which is a shame, because the sheep smelled nicer and behaved better than most passengers. #MetroTrains #ThrowbackThursday

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  Metro 5.25pm Update: Boobs. #MetroTrains

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  METRO 5.35PM UPDATE: ALL LINES ARE RUNNING WELL THIS EVENING WITH NO SIGNIFICANT DELAYS OR DISRUPTIONS. ALSO HOW FUCKING COOL IS CAPS LOCK AMIRITE? #METROTRAINS

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  Metro 5.25pm Update: All lines running well this evening with no incidents or disruptions. We had "major delays due to a track fault in the Craigieburn area" in the office sweep. Looks like we lost that one. #MetroTrains

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  Throwback Thursday! This April 1976 Peter Vincent pic shows a Harris set departing Flinders Street. See how nice the area was before someone built a shitty concrete square over the top of it? #MetroTrains #ThrowbackThursday

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  Let's hope WorkSafe don't figure out some of our Comeng sets are close to 45 years old. https://www.abc.net.au/news/2026-08-31/cfa-volunteers-truck-upgrades-worksafe-victoria/107096752 #MetroTrains

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  Good morning Melbourne! Due to industrial action buses will replace trains Dandenong-Cranbourne and Watergardens-Sunbury until further notice. We see this as bonus outdoor time! Fresh air, traffic views and a chance to really sit with your thoughts. #MetroTrains

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  The Victorian Liberal Party have today stated they will build 25 hybrid trains to service western lines if elected in November. We can only assume they mean something like this. #MetroTrains

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  Throwback Thursday! This Aug 1983 NSW Archives pic shows the launch of the inaugural Sydney-Canberra XPT service. Yep, we're going with this: someone got so excited they ejaculated over the front of the train. #MetroTrains #ThrowbackThursday

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  Going serious here. This is a completely fucking bullshit cunt response from Metro Trains. Multiple safety protocols failed. Don't fucking lowkey victim-blame, deflect responsibility and say you'll "conduct a review". Jesus fucking Christ. #MetroTrains https://www.abc.net.au/news/2026-09-03/guide-dog-dragged-by-train-at-flinders-street-station/107112816

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  From caleb_transport on IG. #MetroTrains