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  2 King: look, if i had to guess Barker: yeah, give us a guess about your pal King: he's not my pal King: but if i had to guess King: i mean, he might be a little depressed about the $474 million he lost on the texas race

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  1 Mr Beast: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of the most dangerous game Richard Connell: hey wait a second

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  1 [mysterious circle of robed figures] Kathleen Stock: dark lord! dark lord! Stock: terrible news!! Stock: the feile en phobail art festival says we can't run our usual genital inspection booth! JK Rowling: WHAT Rowling: thisss iss an outrage!! Rowling: the people LOVE our genital insspection booth!!

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  1 Zach London: so as you can see London: the time has come to submit to gossip goblin London: the age of human creativity is at an end London: now is the age of the goblin

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  1 Zach London: you know that sinking feeling that you get when you click on a youtube video that looks cool but then you realize it's AI slop made by an unfeeling machine? London: what if you could also get that feeling in a movie theater? London: gentlemen i give you gossip goblin

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  1 [mysterious circle of robed figures] JK Rowling: hello children Rowling: finally my evil plan reachesss fruition Rowling: it'ss taken me yearss of careful planning but finally Rowling: finally!!! Rowling: finally we can defeat the sscourge of human rightsss

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  1 Megan Bontrager: Submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of the sea hides its dead Bontrager: where are the dead? Bontrager: you'll never find 'em Bontrager: and why's that? Bontrager: cuz the sea is hiding them

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  1 John Scalzi: [carrying tray of burritos] who wants delicious burritos?! Scalzi: you've got your choice Scalzi: peanut butter and mayo Scalzi: apple sauce and vodka sauce Scalzi: chicken adobo and asbestos Scalzi: beef stroganoff and gravel

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  1 Slimyswampghost: finally! after all these years! SSG: it's happening! SSG: it's the sirenhead movie! Koontz: oo! i love sirenhead! Koontz: does he dance in this movie? SSG: SSG: no Koontz: aw but i like when sirenhead dances

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  1 Stephen King: boy howdy King: this whole graham platner thing King: the sexual assault allegations are pretty troubling King: nevertheless

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  1 Whitley Strieber: welcome to the dreamland podcast Strieber: the only podcast that casts the pod that the man doesn't want you to know Strieber: the truth is out there Strieber: or is that just what THEY want you to think? Strieber: trust no one Strieber: or is that just who THEY want you to trust?

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  1 William Peter Blatty: OMG did you guys hear Poe: what? Blatty: the society of st. pius X has schismed from the mother church! Blatty: this could be the biggest interdoctrinal ecumenitestimal since the integral convergence of the helgrimite blasphemy at the diet of dendronal in 1536!! Poe: King: Lovecraft: Koontz: Barker:

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  2 Blatty: this is like when the blessed council of garbanza rectified the confluence of the discalced silurians in 1232! Poe: King: Koontz: Lovecraft: Barker: Blatty: c'mon it's so obvious! Blatty: it's like a one to one correlation! Poe: King: Koontz: Lovecraft: Barker: Blatty: i don't know how you can't see the parallels

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  1 [at unicorn fuck club] Larry Correia: see, the problem is that GRR Martin didn't finish Game of Thrones Correia: now publishers refuse to take a chance on multi-book epic fantasy series Correia: perhaps GRR should have thought about how that would affect me Correia: the protagonist of reality

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  1 Robin Cook: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of the scary medicine King: wow! scary medicine! Cook: and the scariest part? Cook: it's real King: what?! Cook: that's right! Cook: it could all happen in the not so distant future!

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  1 Lionel Shriver: Submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of the couple who needs to talk about kevin Shriver: it's about a couple who doesn't talk about kevin Barker: how's that work out for them? Shriver: badly

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  1 Stephen King: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of the sleepwalkers King: it's about these cat vampire people Poe: oo! what do they look like? King: kinda like cats King: but gross Poe: i don't understand

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  1 TED Klein: Submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of the possessed evil cat Poe: not a cat! :( Lovecraft: not a cat! :( Junji Ito: not a cat! :( Cordwainer Smith: not a cat! :( Frank Belknap Long: not a cat! :( King: a possessed evil cat! that's a great idea! King: i'm gonna remember that!

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  1 Laura Cranehill: Submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of the wife shaped bodies Edward Lee: yeaaaah boi Lee: that's what I'm talkin' about!! Lee: lemme just put on my 'wife shaped body inspector' shirt

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  1 JK Rowling: hello children Rowling: exciting newssss Rowling: i jussst sspoke to my transss friend Rowling: who agreesss with everything I'm doing and thinksss itsss real great Poe: King: Koontz: Lovecraft: Barker: ah ha ha ha ha ha Poe: clive Barker: no wait i wasn't done Barker: aha haha ha ha!!

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  1 Clive Cussler: to save james patterson, i've assembled this team of crack commandos who escaped from a maximum security prison to join the Los Angeles underground Cussler: special agent Lee Child Cussler: fixer F. Paul Wilson Cussler: and master of disguise Jim Butcher

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  1 Stephen King: submitted for the approval of the midnight Elon Musk [rising from bushes]: eeyyyyy stephano king Barker: hey look steve it's your best friend King: goddamnit clive King: we're not King: elon what do you want this time

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  1 Joss Whedon: greetings whedonistas and whedonistos! Clive Barker: who're you? Whedon: i'm Whedon: i'm joss whedon! Whedon: c'mon, you remember me! Whedon: i was everyone's woke 90s bae!

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  1 Luc Besson: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of incel dracula Besson: so dracula goes to a party, but a courtesan laughs at him! Besson: like, she doesn't even care about his amazing perfume or his $500 gucci sunglasses Besson: fuckin' femoid!!!

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  1 [white house] Trump: so we're bombing venezuela now Trump: no reason, really, just because Trump: we just had all these bombs lying around Trump: and we thought Trump: why not JD Vance: masterful gambit, sir